Yield Hunter Gifts

R. Jones: Investment Advisor - Out Chasing Yield

"Looks like we found the issue."

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

'I highly recommend this painting if you're interested in art as an investment.'

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

Robot Grabber Arcade Game Machine

'We need a product line that will stimulate our profit line.'

"Football is too dangerous, Junior. Why not follow my footsteps in a safe sport - chasing investment yield?"

'The good news is that we're making huge profits - the bad news is that we won't be getting a bailout.'

"And here is where we started putting profits before people."

'Harrison, going against your better judgement has made us a lot of money...'

'Profit in the garbage.'

"Is it too late for me to stop poo pooing his expansion plan?"

'We care because we haven't made enough money not to.'

Cat's golfing with a ball of yarn.

"C'mon! C'mon! Almost there..."

'I know what we need to turn this around, a mindless product that will make money fly out of peoples pocketbooks!'

Business of Finger-pointing

'In our press release, stress that our strategic focus will be on solving society's problems. This is code for making a bundle of money.'

'I only buy art that I can understand.'

'Remember, the best things in life are free. Our job is to acquire them and sell them back to the public.'

Junk Bonds - Back Soon - Out Chasing Yield.

Fat happy businessman with a euro coin printed on his chest

"The bottom line is that we're going out on our bottoms!"

'It saves me the trouble of constantly asking myself 'What's my motivation?''

'It soon became obvious, this stranger meant business!'

"I'm trying to hide Easter Eggs, and he thinks we're playing fetch."

"It's the only image capable of giving him the feels."

Businessman on a Slippery Downward Slide.

'No point in looking for a silver lining - we've already sold off all mineral rights.'

"I don't seem to be able to sniff out money like I used to."

'Psst. . . tell me about your 'obscene dividend' fund.'

'Right here is where we adopted the practice of price gouging.'

"It's time we start moving into this uncharted territory."