Yard Sale Humorist Gifts

Little Brother for Sale: 'I don't care what he did!'

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"There's more inside."

Yard Sale

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

"And I put it to you Mr. MacDonald, that on the morning of December 3rd, you had cold hands whilst attaching a milking machine to my client's udder!"

"All it takes is a little marketing, Tia Carmen!"

'These spare Christmas decorations make perfect bird scarers.'

'Tropical fruit, imported cheese, coconuts...I'm not really into that 'eat locally' stuff.'

"That's... yikes. I mean... what's even going on down there? Honey, I don't think a push-up bra is very flattering on you."

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

"I think I found the perfect time of year to sell my old clothes!"

Annual flower having a mid-life crisis in July

"Well, I thought I'd give fencing a try, but I sucked at it."

Bird baths with two different kinds of water - sparkling and still.

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

"Start talking."

House sale.

Garage Sale (sign originally read 'Garbage' sale).

"I call it 'Moona Lisa'."

'We've found the problem...'

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

'The cow mooed, the pig oinked, the chicken clucked, I baaed and then we adjourned.'

Testing...testing...one, two, three...