Farmyard Humorist Gifts

Why Are You Following Me?

Shocking cows and chickens with the ingredients of the cake.

'Good news. It's not pink eye or a pig sty...just mud in your eye.'

'Let's see... two clucks, three baas, one quack, two oinks, and eight neighs- once again, the neighs have it.'

"So how do we know if they've got this helium virus?"

'Soccer Moms.'

Soap Box

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

'I didn't realise we had to plant our own gear!'

The punishment of a 'SELF MILKER'!

Cow and Pig see 'Staff' logo reflected and read it as 'Fats'.

Pig farm for sale: the stench is too close to the city.

'I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message after the peep.'

Airport Pickups: Mr. Baines, Vinny and Daisy.

She's definitely got the 'X' factor!

Once a rabbit manages to get you in a headlock, you are 'OWNED'!

'What have I been up to? Oh, a moo-moo here, and a moo-moo there.'

"I bet she is not a natural blond."

"Is your business picking up?"

"I'm leaving you, Helen, I need to be free-range."

"I have to say, it`s not every boss that buys their workers a bottle for their hard work."

"Understand this Boris. Continue on your present course and we will invoke code "BROWN" cow control. You have been warned..."

'I'm Loving the 'Group Hug!''

'Now that's what I CALL a free-range chicken'

'They're shaking hands: Looks like we'll be part of the Bride's dowry...'

"I call it 'Moona Lisa'."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"Make sure you wake me up early."

'Ok, this sty is great and all, but can we get some huge explosions? Wilbur, could you say 'it's about to get real'?'

'Mr. President, you have a phone call. It's the First Hen.'

"Collapsed Udder Syndrome?"

'I stay out of the sun and use a fan: That way, I don't need to roll in the mud to keep cool...'

The Burger and the Whopper.

Easier Said Than Done.

See, son? That's what happens when you don