Xylophone Lovers Gifts

Xmas List.

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

"This should be cozy. Just let me know if you need an extra sousaphone."

Cool hand... Uke

I love Marimba

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

'I'm dreading the World Cup . . .'

'Can't talk now, I'm just going into a tunnel.'

More Arts Council cuts...

Annoying xylophone solicitors.

'Not only did I fix the leak, but when you run the hot water it plays 'Harlem Nocturne'.'

Ha! Musical fruit my patootie...

'Goodness me, Graham! I didn't think you had musical bone in your body!'

"Maybe if you played the xylophone like this cat, I'd pay more attention to you."

'Mahler's 9th?'

Though he wrote the world's most listened-to melody, few people know of Tony Bombosa, the genius behind AOL Instant Messenger's four-note jingle.

"Don't worry, it's just a phrase she's going through."

"Is that your 'God Bless America' or mine?"

"There's just one MINOR problem."

"There is nothing wrong with our sound levels!!" "Can you speak up a bit? We can�t hear a word your saying..."

Near-sighted goose falls in love with saxophone.

Clown playing the Saxophone

"No wonder these Yo-Yo Ma tickets were still available. He's going to be playing the saxophone."

There's no such word as "can't".

'C'mon everyone, let's hear: 'Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream. . .'.'

"I'm sick of you going off on me all the time!"

Only one Partridge in a pear tree? Mr. Jones next door gave his true love two partridges.

Bossy Little Dog

Ringing bell

'It's called the Sub-Woofer 1200EX. It's designed specifically for the 16-24 year old driver.'

The evolution of jazz

"This sure beats barking."

'I though I'd developed tinnitus, then I remembered we still have a landline.'

'He ain't texting, Boss...'