X-ray Technicians Gifts

'Your wallet's being stolen. It's good you came in when it first started bothering you. We've caught it early.'

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

"Hello, Pine Grove Elementary? Could you tell Miss Pritchard to come to Lakeview Veterinarian Clinic right away?"

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

'Yeah, the radiology job market is really hot right now - it's so hot I think I'm getting third degree burns! I gotta go!'

'Gee!' (doctor looking at x-ray)

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

'Luckily, it doesn't look too serious.'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

"Can you check inside it for me, Mister?"

There's a popular new health spa down there. The endorphins are having a blast in aerobics. Antibodies are learning kickboxing and the adrenaline is getting some much needed relaxation in the yoga studio. The only problem is the water molecules. Everybody is concerned about them! What's wrong? They haven't been seen since they went into the sauna!

"Should be back soon. He's just out catching a few x-rays."

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

"No wonder I'm getting feedback!"

Orthopaedist

"Peterson should be sure to win the Nobel Prize! He has proven that the mutated Coronavirus also mutates laboratory rats!"

"How the hell should I know what I'm looking at? You're lousy insurance doesn't provide HD X-rays."

'I don't like the looks of this - there's nothing wrong.'

Why dogs are not hired to do bone scans

I owe you an apology for not believing you have back pain.

"I don't like the looks of that Spot on your lung."

"The good news is your back surgery has healed perfectly. However, it looks like you may have to go back for a second exorcism!"

"How cute! Our technician photo-bombed your X-ray!"

'As you can see, the CAT scan of your brain turned up positive.'

"Trust me I'm a Doctor."

'Good news! Your positives look negative.'

'Billy, no! Midterms are tomorrow!'

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"

"Were the x-rays really necessary?"

Alcoholic's X-Ray

'It's so rare you'll need your own teleton.'

"But the good news is I've found my watch!"

"Don't be alarmed. It's just our technician photo-bombing your X-ray."

'I don't want surgery...can you just touch up the x-rays?'