X-ray Technicians Pillows

'Your wallet's being stolen. It's good you came in when it first started bothering you. We've caught it early.'

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

'Gee!' (doctor looking at x-ray)

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

'Yeah, the radiology job market is really hot right now - it's so hot I think I'm getting third degree burns! I gotta go!'

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

'Luckily, it doesn't look too serious.'

"Can you check inside it for me, Mister?"

"Should be back soon. He's just out catching a few x-rays."

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

"Peterson should be sure to win the Nobel Prize! He has proven that the mutated Coronavirus also mutates laboratory rats!"

Orthopaedist

"No wonder I'm getting feedback!"

"How the hell should I know what I'm looking at? You're lousy insurance doesn't provide HD X-rays."

'I don't like the looks of this - there's nothing wrong.'

Why dogs are not hired to do bone scans

"I don't like the looks of that Spot on your lung."

"The good news is your back surgery has healed perfectly. However, it looks like you may have to go back for a second exorcism!"

"How cute! Our technician photo-bombed your X-ray!"

"Trust me I'm a Doctor."

'Good news! Your positives look negative.'

'It's so rare you'll need your own teleton.'

'Billy, no! Midterms are tomorrow!'

Alcoholic's X-Ray

"Don't be alarmed. It's just our technician photo-bombing your X-ray."

'We didn't know what to do with all our old, outdated equipment, so we made a sculpture garden from it.'

"Were the x-rays really necessary?"

"But the good news is I've found my watch!"

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"