X-ray Enthusiast Pillows

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

"Now, what seems to be the problem?"

Gastroesophageal reflux disease.

'Mister Dulaney, I warned you not to move or breath!'

'I'm afraid you're a jerk, Mr. Weatherby.'

'I don't see the problem.'

"Trust me I'm a Doctor."

'I don't like the looks of this - there's nothing wrong.'

"...I'd say your health was way below the poverty line!"

'...You have a hostile takeover bid stuck in your craw.'

'The good news is, you have photogenic lungs!'

"I don't like the looks of that Spot on your lung."

'Gee!'

Why dogs are not hired to do bone scans

'The x-ray confirms it, Mr Thompson - you do not have a single musical bone in your body!'

Alcoholic's X-Ray

"You just had to ask him how he was doing, didn't you?"

"But the good news is I've found my watch!"

'Boss, the techies didn't install this body scanner correctly. It doesn't work.'

"It's the modern dentist's name for x-rays."

X-ray of man with trash can in stomach.

X-Raying Christmas Presents

'It's a furball.'

'Your teeth are okay, but your gums will have to come out'.

Reverse Shadow (Rontgen's X-Ray).

Impatient patient.

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

'Gee!' (doctor looking at x-ray)

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

'Luckily, it doesn't look too serious.'

"Should be back soon. He's just out catching a few x-rays."

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

"How the hell should I know what I'm looking at? You're lousy insurance doesn't provide HD X-rays."