X-ray Aficionados Pillows

"It's definitely dislocated"

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

"Congratulations. The ultrasound shows the baby is healthy, a boy and already knows more about technology than you."

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

'What makes you think we have a radiation leak?'

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

"How the hell should I know what I'm looking at? You're lousy insurance doesn't provide HD X-rays."

"No wonder I'm getting feedback!"

Orthopaedist

'I don't like the looks of this - there's nothing wrong.'

Why dogs are not hired to do bone scans

"I don't like the looks of that Spot on your lung."

"Trust me I'm a Doctor."

'Good news! Your positives look negative.'

"You car pool guys will be going down together for x-rays."

"But the good news is I've found my watch!"

"Were the x-rays really necessary?"

'Your X-Rays are here. . . beautiful high-resolution!'

'I don't want surgery...can you just touch up the x-rays?'

Alcoholic's X-Ray

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"

'Billy, no! Midterms are tomorrow!'

'It's so rare you'll need your own teleton.'

'You're right - the dog did eat your homework.'

Tunnel of Anxiety

'I don't see the problem.'

'Gee!'

"It's the modern dentist's name for x-rays."

X-Raying Christmas Presents