Wrestling Buff Gifts

"Quick somebody call Linda McMahon!"

Muscles

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

That's What Happens

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"We're exclusively delts."

The Lessons of VietnamThe Lessons of Iran and ContraThe Lessons of Iraq.

"I told him he should have trained more."

"Remember when we had to get along on twenty-one dollars a month!"

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

President S Grant's Proposed Civil Service Reform not to the Taste of Certain Senators

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

'It's caused by doing too many wrist curls, overindulging in spinach and... Excuse me. Everyone in here - stat - if you want to see an actual case of 'Popeye Syndrome'!'

"How much could your mother bench?"

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

Mike had learnt by heart the whole training manual, apart from the most important bit.

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

"We supply the exercise and nutrition program, but it's up to you to supply the narcissism."

'This training session is all about challenging assumptions. For example you see someone looking depressed, dishevelled, unkempt it's easy to jump to conclusions. But they may not be a social worker, they may be a client!'

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

"In my workout this morning I hit a new personal best, but on a seasonally adjusted basis, my numbers actually fell."

Fitness Course.

'All I can say is my wife worked out every day when she was pregnant.'

'That guy believes in time travel. He said he'd knock me into next week.'

Raging Bull on Ice

"Cassius Clay....Muhammad Ali....was one name his chatroom nickname or user name?"

'Since I got this exercise ball, my abs have gotten into the best shape they've ever been!'

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'