Worldly Wit Gifts

Greece Idyll

"An Iraq attack is one thing, but I'm not sure about a Persian incursion."

"I had a low birth weight but a high birthright."

Professor Ernie's history of philosophy. Rene Descartes had a difficult childhood. I think, therefore I am! I know you are, but what am I?!

" ... and this is my wife - I'm legally obligated to tell you that."

"You have a lot of unresolved anger and it's settled in your hat."

Is this your father, little guy? No, lady, my father is a libel attorney, and you'll be hearing from him.

G.K. Chesterton.

"What keeps me going? The tightening feeling in my chest that if I stop, I'll die."

'Why do they have to be ivory knitting needles?'

'Please sir - all of them!'

Salmon swimming up-stream, "Don't you get tired of overcoming obstacles"

Generational curses: 'Yeah A virus on your PC'

"You're definitely going to need an extraction."

Penny for your lack of thoughts.

"Gee, I just love the British dry sense of humor!"

7 Reasons You Might Be Irish. . .

"Hey little buddy, let's team up and save the world...Then we'll have pizza, you ever tried pepperoni pizza?"

'You're smarter than you look? -- well, I should HOPE so!'

"Do you have any immature reading?"

'I'm writing a sequel to my autobiography.'

'...and finally I'd just like to thank my plastic surgeon for giving me these puppies.'

'Quick, Bensonhurst-Shaw, I need a bon mot for today's meeting.'

Universal's Sudoku.

'Oh no. How are you going to get it out of that little hole?'

'Relax. They hired me for my people skills.'

'You are charged with habitual drunkeness, What's your excuse'

"Is this seat a disputed area?"

Bogga Springs - Twinned with Geneva

May You Invade in Interesting Times

'What's he like in person? Actually, he's just like a lot of the other people I've met in this industry.'

Check those blueprints again --- I don't think were supposed to put the freezer on both the top and the bottom.

"Why do I want this job? I need your insurance coverage and quick!"

"I love you Clive, but I do wish your brain was bigger than a nut."

"The newspaper is a little more extensive today."