World Ponderers Gifts

"Oh, that's the problem - it was unplugged the whole time!"

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

Paris' magnificent Trifle tower.

"I'm learning to live with existence."

"This number goes out to all the little people I met on my way back down."

Ten Commandments

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

'As I recall you were the one who told him that he couldn't take it with him.'

"Great, now we're lost."

Newton Discovers Surrealism.

Formula.

"Well, once you get your PhD on 'The Return of the Repressed in Early Jacobean Drama', then we;ll discuss how disappointed you are."

"What's so galling is that you don't even realize how Earthist you are."

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."

"Well, this must be as big as I'm supposed to get."

Two books. One liberates the mind, and appears to fly. The other entraps the mind, and appears as a snare trap

Quiz

"Well, son, in a way, I suppose Jesus was a trust-fund baby."

"The arc of the moral universe."

"Eve, do you realize that neither you nor I ever had a childhood?"

'I don't have a single appointment between 1:30 and 2. Do you want me questioning the meaning of my existence?'

"Nobody wants to hear our stories about death from natural causes."

'Have you ever thought that being damned for all eternity to a lake of eternal fire might mask a deeper problem?'

'The rot set in when I started doing these things in my own image - my early stuff was better.'

'You know what I really miss? -- living dangerously.'

"Well...this constant badness is just sooo wearisome...."

"I gave him a public education Artie ol' boy. . . you should know by now that government schools are one of my best minion corporations!"

'My Turing Machine doesn't understand me.'

"The Talmudic umpire It may have been a strike, since it cut the corner of the plate, and yet it was a trifle high, but not really that high, and yet it seemed to curve over the plate..."

"If everyone is gonna get a universal basic income, what is the point of getting good grades?"

'Life is like a cheap steak...it's tough.'

'These are fine, but what's in it for me?'

'At least I'm not accused of being envious, lustful, greedy, prideful, gluttonous or wrathful.'