Workplace Meme Collector Pillows

"When you're too old to work here I will send you to the dog food factory...as dog food."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

Polly txt speak

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Friday

"Bigfoot"

'We will not kick the can down the road... Does anyone know how to use a can opener?'

'I'm surprised you like being your own boss. I am your boss and I hate it.'

"You're a great team player - so we're trading you."

The new contract didn't leave him much room to maneuver his hoverdesk.

"If you'd like to take a seat."

'I believe in a 'carrot and stick' approach to motivation. The carrot is not to use the stick.'

Concerned that she would be passed over for a promotion if management knew she was pregnant, Donna concealed the fact.

"God, I HATE this planet..!"

'And these are the projections if we stop doing silly things like paying the employees.'

'The worst thing is not having access to your e-mail.'

"You're hired!"

'Twitter for goldfish.'

OMG...WTF?....LOL!!!...SOS...

Before disposing of useless information please make file copies.

File Cabinets for Perfectionists

Pavlov's Cat

'Are you the genius who came up with the 'Alternative Payment' program?'

"Good news. You know that elephant in the room we never talk about? He's now in the other room."

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

"This is what I took away from the meeting."

Dinosaur Group Think

"Time to do it in!"

Al, pardon me while I check in on Facebook from "Loonytown."

Change of management - warning about revolving door policy

"It's not backstabbing if I tell our boss how lame you are while you're sitting here, is it?"

'Before I show you where you'll be working, let me just say that some companies use money as an incentive. I use Vito here.'