Workplace Downsizing Gifts

"He's given up trying to find anything else he can cut to reach 40% savings."

"Due to budget cuts this is the replacement for the drinking fountain."

'Good news! I'm quadrupling your pay-cut.'

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

Let's get organized

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"Well the good news is that after the reorganisation you'll be leading the team."

Second hand furniture.

Yardless: Please help

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

It was getting worse. Bob's power suit kept wanting more and more, whereas Bob just wanted out.

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

"In the current market, it's just more practical."

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'I found the home maintenance manual in the attic. I think it's got mildew.'

Yard Sale

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

"Not to mention the park view."

'I thought people were quite receptive to the change seminar.'

Estate Sale! All the stuff my kids said they don't want to inherit.

'Money is a bit tight at the moment, so instead of cash we wondered whether you'd settle for 20% more meaningless protestations of how much we value you?'

'I've misplaced everything.'

"The house doesn't seem big because the kids are gone - it seems big because we've shrunk so much."

"There's lots of things in my life I absolutely needed to put in, and now there's lots of things in my life I absolutely need to get out."

"I'm cutting out a complete layer of management."

'My old Nehru suit! And in a pocket there's still a bottle of aftershave lotion from the glove box of my '55 Nash Rambler.'

"I'm thinking of leaving these crowded condos and going to a place that's been deserted for years...the mall."

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

"We settled into the one-level after our hips got bad."

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

"Life isn't fair, and that's what makes it fun."

For the musician strapped for space...the Murphy piano.

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."