Witty Conversation Lovers Gifts

'Mom can I have another apple?'

"I don't know if I can do 'Gilmore Girls' today. I'm not sure I'm feeling up for anything involving witty yet poignant repartee."

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

Protest

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

I thought I was proposing to Sally, but evidently I was challenging her to a twenty year series of debates.

'If you must know, yes, I do sometimes fake purring.'

"Darling, do you ever worry that we're becoming some sort of Merchant-Ivory production?"

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

Crow and fox

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

Happy Hour 5-7. (Not really an hour, not really happy.) At last, truth in advertising.

'I see an applicant being hired!'

"I find it disturbing when you breathe through your nose."

'I understand you know how to treat a woman.'

"Are we ‘still working’? No, we’re still eating. You, however, are ‘still working’—now get lost!"

Jokes machine.

The Algonquin Round Table

When Stupid People Get an Idea

"Tell her I'm exercising my twenty-first amendment rights."

Cold caller.

Papa, how come Rudolph has a red nose? Because he's a drunk, son. Plain and simple.

Bat out of Hell

Bar Therapy

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

"So, what is your star sign?"

The Gilmore Girls

"It doesn't look much like a 'witty painting' now, does it sir?"

"Virginia Woolf meets 'Car Talk.'"

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'