Wine Blending Gifts

In the Guru District

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

Pete Townshend Vineyards

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

The Vineyard

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'A cheeky red?'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

Sauvignon Bonk

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

Bacchus.

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'... And this is my cellar.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

"We're hoping for a really smooth wine here."

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"He gets easily abstracted."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

"I make it myself!"

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

Pasta

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'