Blending Gifts

'I don't 'do' chewing!'

Bananas eye the blender

Food Porn

Preparing to paint an un-still life.

'...So it's an orange orange Roughy smoothie?'

'Oh, dude. That is just NASTY. Did you juice your cell phone?'

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

'OK, everybody...'Louie, Louie' from the top!'

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

New music conference

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"Since when did economists become sociologists?!"

Couple with lots of kids. Woman says: 'This is our daughter, my son from my first marriage, John's daughter from his second marriage, and I've no idea who the one on the end is.'

'Whenever I want to cut my lesson short, I ask the music teacher if she has any hip-hop music for the violin.'

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."

Oh you smoothie

Base camp for Ed and Janet Wilson's courageous attempt to scale Mt. Blended Family.

Cowpunk

Motor-blender.

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

"My trick for enjoying kale? I put in blueberries, a banana, a scoop of vanilla ice cream and ice. Then I throw the kale in the trash and blend."

'Yesterday her kids and my kids started beating up our kids.'

'That's the great Scottish Indian fighter, Hawkeye the Noo!'

A Heavy Metal Musician.

A writer writing humour and tragedy at the same time.

"Other than leaving the lid off the blender, I think my first smoothie went rather well!"

'I like to puree before I crunch the numbers.'

"I guess I thought 'Andy and the blenders' was a band."

'You know, I think I'm in the wrong nest.'

"I'm feeling rather spirited tonight, James. Put on something Mozarty but with a touch of Hendrix."

'Now you tell me the blender has a lid!'

There was something in her writing for just about anyone.

Pulp Science Fiction

" guess we can relax. They say they're Zulu Surfer Dudes."

'After 30 years around here, Jenkins has the ability to assume the colors of his environment.'