Wine Acrobats Gifts

A high wire act walks over to a bottle of wine.

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'A cheeky red?'

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

Bacchus.

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Sauvignon Bonk

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

"I think it stopped breathing."

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

"He gets easily abstracted."

'There's something hauntingly familiar about the bouquet.'

"I make it myself!"

'Man...You age great!'