Windy Philosophers Gifts

Girl to mother regarding blowing wind: 'I wish the wind would breathe in.'

'You lifted your head.'

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

"He's declared it an area of natural beauty"

Winter Weather.

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"Do you think the birds like me?"

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

'I'm afraid I'll fall and no one will hear me.'

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

Deer against capital punishment about to be shot.

"Tracks of black bear cub... Tracks of black bear mother... Tracks of Henry David Thoreau."

The Boys of Indian Summer

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

'I respond to stimuli, therefore I ham.'

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!!"

The Farmer Sutra.

'By George, this one I think I'm going to like!'

'It had taken some time, but the finding of a spaghetti junction brought immense satisfaction.'

"I love the way it blurs the boundary between inside and out."

'I became a bit claustrophobic living in a warren all the time: I prefer camping out now...'

"Did you ever notice, the snow is always whiter on the other side of the glacier?"

"They think I don't have a clue."

"I swear, we spend more time decided which squirrel to bark at than we do actually barking at it."

'A little madness in the Spring is wholesome even for the King' -Emily Dickinson.

Fish Food

'It's almost time to get the cross-country skis out and dust them off.'

"Why can't they call it a 'Deer' or a 'Squirrel' market?"

"I'm sorry your girlfriend left you, Frank...but you must concentrate on the job!"

"What do you have to do to get business class?"

Caution - Poet at work

'Well, that answers that age-old question. According to the tape, the chicken came first. . . which brings up another age-old question: is the last one a rotten egg?'

Can we see our way clear to doing something about air pollution?