Window Opener Gifts

'Relax, I'm only going to open a window.'

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'She's so put together!'

'Rozlyn, that blouse is very cute! I think you should get it.'

"I don't do windows."

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

"The good news is...you've one less window to wash."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

"Quick swig first?"

'Whatever you do, don't tell them you think you're ready to take on more responsibility!'

'It says, please disregard this reminder if your payment has already been sent.'

"You might say I'm middle-of-the-road. I'd buy a fur coat but I wouldn't buy a Japanese fur coat."

'Just look'in'

This Saturday 10:30 Confessions of a Window Cleaner, Doctor, Nurse, Policeman, Shop Worker, Lollipop Lady, Butcher, Baker, Housewife, Schoolboy...

"Would you mind filling this with confetti?"

'The contractor didn't do windows.'

"Clean your specs, lady?"

'The staff are calling for transparent management Miss Beamish and this is it.'

Plane windscreen cleaner

"I need nothing and I want everything."

"On second thought Rex, I may just leaven them until spring."

"This home doesn't have a good view, but it comes with smart windows that change the view to something beautiful."

"Then I'll huff and I'll puff..."

'As a teleworker Colin sometimes struggled against feelings of isolation.'

"I was quite pleased to find a job which allows me to see more of my husband."

''Wait till they've gone, then quietly clean the windows', I said - But you won't be told!'

"I tweeted yesterday. 'Sleep with your windows open'. It was liked and shared by 2000 mosquitos."

A man opens his curtains to wake up his cats.

Window Cleaner asks for help.

'He's sulking because I caught him licking the cake shop window.'

"Slow down, I want to take a peek in Barneys!"