Wildlife Chef Gifts

'Your dinner's in the oven.'

City Zoo: Day Care

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

Deer Season Open.

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

"The raw material was all around me: That's how I got started as a sculptor..."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

"Sure, while you went out robbing folks I stayed here and made a nice quiche, and just to prove I'm not a sissy I made it with mountain lion instead of ham."

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

Monkey-artist

"Catching him was easy. Getting him through the cat door....Now that's another story."

"Lori, out here it's my kitchen!"

"Go ahead if you want to: Me, I'll wait for the bears to be sated before I risk it..."

Save the unicorn.

"Touché"

"Hey Neil, you wanna come hang out with us today?"

'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'

'We're a protected species and an endangered speices, but when I see a person, I don't know if he's protecting us or endangering us.'

'Good grief! Aren't you extinct yet?'

Climate Change

"Man! That squirrel was jacked!"

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

"The Nominees"

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

'There is nobody else. I'm afraid we've wiped out all of the other species.'

'What should we do? It's an endangered animal eating an endangered plant!'

'That's right - a restraining order. You should know mother bears are very protective of their young.'

"Here's the news: the Maharajah's tiger-hunt is on Tuesday afternoon. You've been warned..."

"People don't give me bread crumbs. I take them."

"He's not on the critical list, but he's on the Endangered Species list."