Wicket Whiz Gifts

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

'I actually look forward to hibernating during bull markets.'

'Make it look like an accident.'

'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'

"I was doing pretty well in the stock market until I discovered there were laws."

'I had three catches dropped today.' - 'Yes, but the were dropped by spectators in the stand.'

Um... Can I get an 'L', Pat?

"Come on, Lucky Lady!"

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

Johann Strauss

"Wow! - Record climate emergency in Western Canada!. . ."

'Today we're going to simulate rough weather conditions.'

"Nah...not really...he's only won one game!" (Clever dog).

Tennis Player.

British patent (applied for) A Trained Dog of war Drawing the Enemy's Fire.

Football

"'Thank you for sending us your manuscript,' she exclaimed. 'You're welcome,' I retorted. 'Unfortunately, it's not what we are looking for,' she opined. 'How disappointing,' I remarked."

"Can you believe English isn't the official language here?"

'Well you know what they say 'here today gone tomorrow' or in the case of dotcoms, 'here today gone shortly after lunch.'

Bowled out.

'That was quite a storm we had last night!'

'We had to discontinue the alphabet soup -- we were getting too many libel suits.'

"The boring bit about cricket is waiting for them to find the ball after you've hit a six."

"I realise children are learning to use computers at an early age, but this is outrageous!"

Publication Day for Johnson's Dictionary

"Hardscrabble"

'Before you get into the market, we need to test your pain threshold...'

'How did your bowling go?. . . I didn't realize you eyesight was so bad.'

"It's not the heat or the humidity. It's the sulfur dioxide, hydrogen sulfide, non-methane hydrocarbons and sulfuric acid mist."