Wicked Wit Appreciator Gifts

'Glory be, but isn't it great to be in the doom and gloom business this year?'

"To paraprase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure with out pain au chocolat."

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

'Of course I'm on the pull - I'm a cricketer.'

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

Cat Burglar

'What's the matter... you're not grim here?'

"Tell me more about your fear of going bald."

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

Lot for people who don't know how to park.

Voltaire

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

Late Night with Patrick O'Brian

'I owe you an apology, Greffman -- Let's keep it that way.'

"I don't think you have a case. It's only slander if it's not true, and I've heard you play."

"Getting a little thin on top and dull below, eh Pop?"

'How can you stand to listen to dozens of crazy people and stay sane?' - 'Who listens?.'

Pick your own fruit or worms.

I was thinking about something more like a slogan.

The People versus McGinley gets acrimonious.

Dorothy Parker at the Algonquin Round Table

"Uh. . . Ooh. . . Here come the know it alls again!"

Figure of Eight

'It's a good job I was trapped by my wooden leg and not my good one, son!'

Circus. I'm giving up the seltzer bottle as a comedy prop and will do a more sophisticated act. Ah, dry humor.

'Wow! This style of writing went out back in the seventies!'

'Please sir - all of them!'

Bit on the Side

'I'm a little worried about the dedication to His Satanic Majesty, Bishop.'

'How's my appeal going?', 'How's your tunnel going?'

Inn and Outt.

Black Death

7 Reasons You Might Be Irish. . .