White-collar Crime Buff Gifts

"The bank examiners are here, oh!...I see you already know."

'I was just getting used to handling large sums of money.'

"'Small potatoes' is no defense."

The classic 'large scale corporate raider' eventually, they end up catching themselves!!

'Ms. Andrews, have there been any important office memos, voice-mails, texts, tweets or IMs during my incarceration?'

'Henderson makes money the old fashioned way - White collar crime.'

"I worked hard, I played hard and I embezzled hard."

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

"You can lie to the prosecutor but don't ever lie to your co-conspirators."

"Looks like he's been salted, Sarge.2

"Have you ever heard about deferred prosecution agreements, Mommie?"

"My client pleads not guilty, by reason that everyone else is doing it."

'Apparently 'executive assistant' is just a fancy term for scapegoat.'

"At last, a country that welcomes poor refugees like me..."

"I was just trying to kick-start the economy. Guess I kicked too hard."

Black market trade in foodstuffs is thriving.

'We know the elephant died when he jumped off the roof. But the other guy? It's a mystery.'

"It's easier to make 'em talk when you just cement the feet."

'My only regret is not waiting for deregulation.'

Practicing for the lie detector test...'I have only $800 in the bank. I was never in Chicago. I know nothing about the dog food business.'

"All right, which one stole your identity?"

'I'm taking a poll. Do you feel safe in your own home?'

'No, you can't fake your own death and leave all your money to yourself.'

'The company has got flexible working hours. I've got to be on the spot when they need me, that's why they tie me to a tree near the front door after work.'

"I've given him your message. If you'll just take a seat, he'll be out in a moment with his hands up."

"What we're going to say to the jury is 'Love the embezzler. Hate the embezzlement."

"How do you feel about doing time?"

'We find the defendant guilty, but feel his alibi would make a good premise for a John Grisham book.'

'Impersonating a police officer. What are you in for?'

'When to sell a stock? My rule has been to do it when I'm ready to skip the country with my client's assets.'

'What shall I do with this mega fingerprint?'

'I got 5 years for something I didn't do. I didn't run fast enough. . .'

"How'd you get this number?"

"I'm sorry, Mr Weinstock can't see you at the moment - he's on the run."