White-collar Commentator Gifts

'You're a legend, sir. We studied you in our criminal justice class.'

"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."

“Son, that… ‘some this will all be yours’… is now!”

Ponzi-Mat Vending Machine

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

White Collar Crime.

"White Collar Prison"

A deadline comes to chew up a worker.

'You said you wanted more responsibility, so I'm making you responsible for everything that goes wrong.'

'I'll fix the problem... you fix the blame.'

"Embezzlement is now called virtual bank robbery."

Hellbillies.

"We're talking business ethics not ethics."

'Quite frankly sir, I think you're stifling my creativity.'

"What a great day to be alive and not under indictment."

'I don't want to rob the rich anymore, Marian, I want to BE the rich.'

'Dad, somehow I got into the IRS files.'

'Of course it's not your fault, Smedley, but someone has to accept the responsibility.'

"Now we'll all close our eyes and cover our ears, and the person who took the four hundred and twenty-eight million dollars will put it back."

"As your cell bitch, I imagine my Sarbanes-Oxley expertise should come in quite handy."

'The company has got flexible working hours. I've got to be on the spot when they need me, that's why they tie me to a tree near the front door after work.'

'You're too late...I embezzled it.'

"I suggest we continue to treat everything as allegations until we all have to plead guilty."

"The government certainly isn't wasting our hard earned tax money...we're tax evaders!"

'Honey! I got promoted to long sleeves!'

'Maybe we are micro-managing a bit too much.'

". . . but, it will be great to see the old gang."

Department of Commerce, Economic Forecasting, Division of Estimates & Alibis

'Of course, you'll be paid a generous scapegoat bonus.'

"So apart from the soul crushing workload mindless bureaucracy and jawdropping Lee done management are you happy with your work?"

'At least you're leaving with your dignity? Oh no you're not! Any dignity accrued working here is clearly company property.'

"I did warn you it wouldn't pay!"

Employee Evaluations Today. This is what I hate most about being married to the job --- Having to talk about the relationship.

"Son, I'm proud of you! You're the fiest in the family to study and wear a tie at work!"

McGhee makes a run for it!