Whimsical Wit Supporter Gifts

'Without thinking Captain Hook uses the wrong hand'

Skipping Horse

"Actually, make that a double cream."

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

"Would the widdle Venus fly trap like a fly? You'll have to beg for it."

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

Dog in casino.

"Kids these days and their piercings..."

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

The worm that churned!

Ask A Silly Question.

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...

The GPC has written to ministers about how children can be more involved with the NHS

"When I go, I’d like my ashes dumped on top of a squirrel’s head."

"This way I don't have to lug around that big bag."

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

"I've worked as a wet-nurse for ten years, but I'm after something new now..."

"I was kicked out from another kid's bed. Do you mind if I crash under yours for awhile?"

'How come this sheep tastes like sugar?'

"I'm thinking considerably longer. How about you, Alan?"

"Look! A sushi bar!"

"There's someone sleeping in my pew, and she's still there!"

'I'VE GOT EYE CANDY!'

Bus for Giraffes.

"Excuse me, but I'm the only one who opens cans around here!"

'He has his father's feet.'

CX909708

Banana

The Tin Man really should have asked the wizard for common sense.

'My biological clock finally went off.'

JEEZ! Who the hell is drawing you?

"I've finally accepted the fact that I am full of it. . . with the help of my psychiatrist."

"Charlie's really interested in co-operative housing..."