Whimsical Physicist Gifts

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

Professor Clown teaches advanced physics

Swan Fairy Tales

Lactose Intolerant

'Are you made of sugar?'

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

Dogs and their thoughts

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

'Fetching is a good thing...but there can be TOO MUCH of a good thing.'

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

Spring Training

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

Giant using sheep as cotton buds

"Scuba cow"

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

"Yes, one is a dog."

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

A man rakes a tree

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

Fishing for Birds

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

Fluffy explains her string theory.

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"

Alice in Wonderland-Hare and Hatter putting Dormouse in Teapot

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"