Whimsical Philosophers Gifts

'If there is an unlimited supply of something, it tends to be under appreciated. Perhaps one advantage of mortality is that it makes our time finite and, therefore, gives it value. . . Hey! I think I'll poop on this guy's head.'

The Artist

Swan Fairy Tales

Lactose Intolerant

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

'Are you made of sugar?'

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

Dogs and their thoughts

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

'Fetching is a good thing...but there can be TOO MUCH of a good thing.'

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"Yes, one is a dog."

Selfie Stick

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

Giant using sheep as cotton buds

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

"Scuba cow"

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"

A man rakes a tree

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

Giant reptiles use building as a pinata.

Fishing for Birds

Two birds sharing a bowl of worms.

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

Alice in Wonderland-Hare and Hatter putting Dormouse in Teapot