Whimsical Judges T-Shirts

'Judge Mental.'

'Court's in recess!'

"We need a market icon that reflects the ridiculous market conditions..."

Cheap amusement with... THE HAPPY COUPLE!

"We, the jury, find the defendant."

Judge to attorneys in courtroom wearing boxing gloves: 'Looks like you're both ready for your opening arguments, gentlemen?'

'And then the bad man from the Securities and Exchange Commission and I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house down!'

'Disqualified!... He did not yell 'Boing' when he jumped!'

'I wonder if I can increase its range?'

I was allowed to chew this. But not that

"And what's more, you have a complete disrespect for the law."

'I believe in Santa Claus, and I believe in the guaranteed annual 10% return.'

Dreary counsel sending the judge and jury to sleep

Help yourself

'I can't take all the credit. My childhood imaginary friend picked a lot of my stocks.'

"So, Mr. Claus, there IS a Virginia!"

'Ta Da! A brand new set of festive outdoor dinnerware for all my summer entertaining!!'

"It's your cat broker, Madame - he has a hot tip on a Siamese."

'This is better than magic beans, Jack. It's stock in the company that makes the magic beans.'

'...Plus six months for breaking my little hammer!'

'I'm sure the Senate will affirm my action.'

"Brick, Eh? Well, sorry to blow your house down but these days it's not wise to be so invested in stability."

'Sorry, Mr. Weinbaum, but you should have said 'Simon says not guilty.''

'Of all times to have a dance tune get stuck in my head.'

"Does this mean that you're ready to cop a plea?"

"He may be a famous artist, but I find his work too chocolate-boxy."

Lawyer to pirate with patch over eye: 'Tell me about the injury this Cap'n Hook gave you trying to high five.'

'Can you be more specific? Are you pointing at IBM, IMCLONE, INTEL...?'

Financial advice books for boomers.

'My client pleads not guilty by reason of mood swings.'

"I find in favour of Aggie's Day Care. Defendant is ordered to sit in the corner for one hour."

'If these coins take root Sid, money really will grow on trees!'

"Sell all my stocks and buy lots of old comic books instead!"

Evaluating the humorousness of cartoons.

'Do you have a plan B if you can't find work as a frivolous suit litigator?'