Western Gifts

"O.K., fellers, we shoot first, then Q. and A."

Cowboy in Old West boasts of having shot a guy for ending a sentence in a preposition.

"It's just a loaner while my other horse is in the shop."

Cowboy with arrow in hat shouting 'CUPIDS!'

'You refuse to admit someone stole your horse, don't you?'

'Pay and display' parking outside a saloon.

"Those idiots, they're burning their own arrows! Oh - oh, God no."

"It's a great country–just don't get sick."

Old cowboys never die...

"Let's see if you look better in a nine gallon hat."

Mans best friend

'Sure is a fancy spread you've got out here.'

'Well any Pal o' yours is a pal o' mine.'

Just Protestors

'Yep, this is quite a spread you've got, Bobbie Joe!'

"It's high time we introduced immigration quotas."

Vote Counter: 'Okay,DONE! It's settled! The NEIGHS have it!'

"Well, I'll be-we just spent all weekend planning to rob a façade."

Ponderosa

"The 'Kid' must be inside."

Notice: All cowboys must shake off dust by hitting clothes with hat.

"When you say 'my people,' do you mean your tribe or your reps?"

'Man! I wish I'd finished college.'

A boy dressed as a cowboy riding a stick horse encounters a stick with a cow's skull at the end lying on the ground.

Davey Crockett passed his bar exam.

"Love your jeans."

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us to social distance effectively."

"Keep your eyes open, pardner, this is Apache country!"

'This was the life the young cowboy had dreamed of! Where else could you find people out in the sun with no regard for sunscreen?! Yes this, was the wild west!'

Cowboy in a thong.

"The tumble weed probably set it off."

'... But I thought you said to get a long, little doggie, boss.'

'I don't feel at home on the range any more!'

"This is the last time I help you and your 'nervous hoof'."

"Dunno which one of 'em did it, but we just got two stars on Rate Yer Driver."