Welcoming A First Child Gifts

Guessing games!

'It's crazy what a peep will eat.'

The modern generation!

'Shouldn't you be out in line...'

"His first out-of-body experience."

Madonna of the Pukes.

A young Don King

Santa Claus's Mail

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

"I'd like to get my hands on whoever coined the phrase 'sleeps like a baby'."

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

Baby's first thought...Daddy's a moron.

'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'

'Can you tell me what I've written? I can't read!'

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Honey, where's the baby?" "The first voyage of Sinbad"

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

'A is for Arse.'

"You go out first. Signal me if it's safe!!"

"Helmet, check. Harness, check. Knee and elbow pads, check. You may now push the swing."

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

"They look so young and helpless."

"Yeah, I'm still scared of it too, but the worst part is that it seems to be GROWING...."

'It makes baptisms a lot more fun for everyone.'

Little chef.

'Have you picked out a domain name, yet?'

"Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 2."

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

"Don't worry about her sucking her thumb. Soon she'll be texting with it."

Extra innings.

She doesn't like my song? All the kids LOVED it at Day Care!