Wedge Issues Warriors Gifts

The Torch Is Passed

Biceps, muscles and brawn

Bench Press Accident

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

'You know darn well 'Aaargh' isn't a real word!'

'If social security were privatized, the administration also suggested a name change to 'Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld holdings inc.''

"Don't worry, Emily. . . I'm woke and you're woke, so I'm sure our baby will turn out woke!"

"Can I put in a claim for interview trauma compensation?"

'Bad dog- I said WALKIES!'

The auto-update demons attack-again."

'For heaven's sake Armitage - can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category?'

'You have a harmless but highly irritating form of nervous disorder we call D.Y.I. - Diagnosing Yourself on the Internet.'

'No Jennifer! I never head of mad broccoli disease.'

"Interesting diagnosis. Now let's ask Google for a second opinion, shall we?"

'Get me a match! The pilot light in our competitive fire is out!'

"You know, if lima beans, cauliflower and broccoli tasted like candy and ice cream, we wouldn't have to go through this every night!"

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'

'Hey! We can play Scrabble while we eat!'

'Did they say WHY you could no longer be a Spartan?' 'Something about, 'image'.'

"All in favor of toupees, say aye."

"All we are saying. . . is give peas a chance!"

"The Chef's Special is to die for. If you order it, you'll need to sign a waiver."

'Unfortunately, Mrs. Himner, spot weight reduction is impossible. You need to lose weight overall.'

'I disagree with you, doctor. It's not just a hangnail. According to the Internet, it's a rare genetic disorder. . .'

"Maybe we should lay off the upper body training till your head pops back out."

"One day past humpday, one to go until slumpday."

'...But then I ran across a dead mastodon, and gained it all back!'

I haven't been hired yet.

'Are you willing to change your name to Bob Smith?'

Horse racing is the only sport where a 3 year old can make an adult behave like a baby!

Genghis Khan

"If it's so good for you....couldn't it smell good too?"

Vegetarian Nightmare

'I've given up my vegetarian diet - it's just too darn hard to find a vegetarian.'

"I got Wordle in two this morning! I don't even know what 'ennui' means." "Everyone despised Larry."