Website Management Gifts

'Just like the website, lots of visitors, few conversions.'

'Sanders, our numbers on google are slipping, let's pump up the keywords.'

'I know it's the truth, but on this promo for our site, do you think we should use the promo code 'desperation?''

'I and my Blog'

"If my website is so hard to find, how come I keep getting offers from experts to put me prominent on Google?"

"Looks like we found the issue."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'The check is in the email attachment.'

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'Let's not go by the book.'

Let's get organized

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'That's our mission statement.'

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'