Weather Worrier Gifts

"Long term I'm worried about global warming - short term, about freezing my ass off."

"It's too hot to eat."

'I know I'm just a weather reporter, doc, but I feel guilty every time it rains.'

'Now that it's March, it's safe to put the snow shovels away, right?'

'Absolutely nobody likes all this rain and flooding...'

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

'Read that part again where it predicts a cold, snowy winter for the midwest...'

'Weather department? I've just shovelled ten inches of 'slightly cloudy' off my driveway.'

'It isn't on a flood plain is it?'

"Another jumper dear?"

A Man for All Seasons (Except Winter and Summer)

"We have to recognise that severe weather events are becoming more common. . ."

'Looks like they're expecting floods again.'

Typical...the weather is lousy all week...then on the weekend it's too sunny to work.

'There are only 12 rain-free shopping days 'till Christmas.'

'The trouble these days a few snow flakes and the country comes to a halt, when I was your age...'

'Any sign of that flippin' plumber yet, Dear?'

'Take it easy! Thinking snow doesn't mean necessarily mean wanting snow!'

"When the waters subside, the problem's going to be mold."

"With rain in nearly every forecast, probably because of global warming, you know what's coming...so officially, we are now News & Sports at Six."

"There's a big world out there I know nothing about. And with any luck, I never will."

Holidays - before and after.

"There's a storm in my tea cup, I wonder if it has a name?"

"You might as well go on, son. I don't think they're going to call off school because of the snow storm."

"Too sunny for you. Too dry. Whatever next?"

"The weatherman said it was important to stay cool but now I've got my foot stuck in the butter."

"Hurry up and pick that lock. I'm hungry and it's freezing out here."

'Even with the impact of global warming I think Timmy would be safe enough with factor 95'

"Is it always so cloudy?"

People run from a falling cloud

I hate the first day of autumn. It's too late to complain about the heat, and it's too early to complain about the cold.

Stunned Agin!

I hate monday mornings.

Customer: 'Hey Waiter! There's a STORM in my teacup!'

'That was quite a storm we had last night!'