Weaponry Buffs Pillows

'Howitzers at dawn.'

Armed to the teeth.

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

"But I use all of them!"

"Very few people are aware that the 'New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle is contagious."

Two gamers play in a game arcade near a machine titled; 'Get a life'.

'The wife says if I don't give up snooker, she's leaving me. . .I'm going to miss her.'

'The attack will have to wait until tomorrow Congressman. Today is furlough day. . .'

Servant Painting Targets Around Arrows Shot by a King

Newton discovers surrealism

Um, General Hannibal, a word if I may...

'Someday one of us will look back on this and laugh.'

"Lovely weather for it."

'Teddy, someone from the Pentagon wants to talk to you about drones in Pakistan, whatever that means.'

'Her and her silicone implants!'

Sympathy

Cricket.

'In a recent technological breakthrough, scientists have found the gene that enables humans to find genes. Engineers have began splicing this gene with pig DNA to create a race of lab research slaves. And now on to the weather. . .'

'I don't have the patience for this problem.'

Light Artillery

'Jerry! That bus you just cut off says 'Olympic Archery Team' on the side!'

"Can you believe I was denied a 'Concealed Carry' for this?"

'...and then the photographer told me to hold the Sharps like this.'

"He started with the gunslinger opening, but quickly ran into the posse defense."

Sir Louie the Bench-Warmer pumps up the home crowd, and the tide of battle begins to turn.

Friends.

"Before I can write your insurance policy, this place has to be made more accessible. I almost fell in your moat!"

Toast baseball.

Bidder 2 bids £4 - 'Peel bids £5. Take that, Bidder 2.' - 'Bidder 2 bids £6.' - '£8. How you like it now, bitch, eh?!' - 'Bidder 2 bids £9.' - 'Give me the damn 'bread maker'!!!' -

"When your only tool is a trebuchet, every problem looks like a siege."

The archer is better looking, but the fighter has more hit points.

Confederates Attack Union Flotilla at Galveston, Texas- USS Westfield Exploding

Computer Chess.