Arms And Armament Buffs Pillows

'...and then the photographer told me to hold the Sharps like this.'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

"But I use all of them!"

"Very few people are aware that the 'New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle is contagious."

Two gamers play in a game arcade near a machine titled; 'Get a life'.

"Can you do battle with him later?... He's watching, 'Game of Thrones'."

'The wife says if I don't give up snooker, she's leaving me. . .I'm going to miss her.'

'Every war game scenario I've run has you picking up the check.'

"Some dinosaurs died out more quickly than others" "You want some?"

Servant Painting Targets Around Arrows Shot by a King

Newton discovers surrealism

Ex-soldier carrying a tank home.

'Let me guess - You want to be a helicopter pilot?'

Retired Command Sgt. Maj. Basil L. Plumley 1920-2012.

"Lovely weather for it."

Imran Khan

Really big bang

"Professor, just how long did you say that evolution thing takes?"

'Someday one of us will look back on this and laugh.'

"Ever get the feeling you're in the wrong army?"

'Teddy, someone from the Pentagon wants to talk to you about drones in Pakistan, whatever that means.'

'You never had it so good! Just wait! You'll come crawling back to me!'

'You know, you shouldn't make the evolutionary jump from water to land until an hour after you eat.'

Sympathy

Cricket.

"I can't heeear you!"

'Her and her silicone implants!'

"No, thanks. I'm in training."

"Lots of people will lose their jobs to robots, but I don't think they can ever replace us!"

"Can you believe I was denied a 'Concealed Carry' for this?"

Friends.

Think tank: 'I think therefore I blow stuff up!'

'I can't understand why no one came to our housewarming.'