Water Sipper Gifts

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

Sparkling Water

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

'I don't know what he gets up to in there, but it keeps him busy.' (Noises are recorded, man reads paper, has beer.)

City Boy.

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

The last song before the party exploded.

"Whine and cheezed party."

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'You know what would be really romantic? If, just for once, you sat at the tap end.'

No boyfriend, can't be bothered t-shirt

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

'I don't like her line of gossip - it's never about anyone I know.'

"'60 Minutes' is on."

'Dad, is this like ... you doing your own thing?'

"How do I know if it's fresh?... You asked for 'the soup of the day'. You didn't specify what day."

"Mom, what kind of soup do we eat when we're sick?"

'Come to order' 'I'll have a burger, hold the mayo, and a large cola.'

Margaret got tired of waiting for her ‘slow-brew' tea.

'It's not worth worrying about. There's nothing you can do about it. No two quarks in a small region can occupy the same quantum-mechanical state.'

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

Lady on left - 'He's a man after my own heart' Lady on right - 'A cardiologist?'

'Your tooth still sensitive to hot liquids my dear?'

'I've still got the fire in my belly, but for the next two weeks I'm solar powered.'

"My famous chicken soup! The secret ingredient is the rum."

"When I was your age, I was a lot older."

"You need a hobby."

"I'll just have a Diet Coke. I'm in the middle of my novel."

"It's still stew but the celebrity chef wants to call it a deconstructed steak and ale pie with a dusting of salt in a brown sauce coulis."

"A foot bath after a long hard day at work is really nice!"