Coffee Sipper Gifts

"Transitioning from home to office again is more difficult for some than others."

Having flexibility over where and when you work, can help with your productivity.

"I'd call my doctor and ask him but I can't speak his national language."

Carol simply couldn't relax knowing that at any moment five rowdy men might scream "FUMBLE!"

"He was that needy, he actually asked me on a second date."

Paddy Macaroon.

One of the positives of having to 'Shelter in Place'...

Waitress oblivious to the fact she's spilling coffee all over the table and her customer.

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

"You taught him to bring the paper?" "Just the comics."

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"'60 Minutes' is on."

"Each one wanted me to wear his Father's Day present first."

'Mom, does half 'n' half come from cows that can't make up their minds?'

Joan forgets to put on her car hand-brake again.

"We are experiencing high call volume. Please do not hold."

"He's great at both sit and stay."

"The eyes of the beast burrowed deep into his soul with laser-sharp precision. In a moment, Liam would succumb to the relentless silent stare of his nemesis and best friend. One question remained: kibble or canned?"

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

City Boy.

'I don't know what he gets up to in there, but it keeps him busy.' (Noises are recorded, man reads paper, has beer.)

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

The last song before the party exploded.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"Whine and cheezed party."

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

Beach flirting

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, fell, and retained a brilliant attorney."

'You know what would be really romantic? If, just for once, you sat at the tap end.'