Water Cooler Hero Gifts

"So I sold him six with a 23% profit margin, so what do you think of that!"

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"Bill's a little upset. The boss just chewed him out."

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

"The corner ledge is reserved for senior management."

"Keep up the good work, whatever it is, whoever you are."

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

"Being my own boss sounds fun but I wouldn't be able to motivate myself."

'I have an MBA, but I've never MBAed.'

Fish Posting No Fishing Sign

"Most of us get around the company motto by saying 'No can do' instead!"

"....And the weatherman said it was going to be a hot one today so take it easy and stay hydrated..."

'I'm here for 10 years and I don't have a clue about what this company is doing. I'm here just because of the gossip!'

Larry was always invited on camping trips because of his ice chest

'Tough day at the office! Somebody broke the water cooler!'

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

'While you were out I replaced you.'

"This is a tough place to work..."

"Thanks for your offer, but in our company we still have a perfect information and communication system. It's called water cooler talk."

"He's still bitter that bottled water ruined his reign as king of the water cooler."

'I'm on my break, Sam... I'll call you back when I start work.'

'Uh-oh... the boss is wearing his safety boots! That means, someone will get kicked out today!'

"There! Now let's hear no more noise about wanting a glass of water!"

Friday is Wet Khakis Day!

"Must be the new philosophy teacher."

'What can I say, Carol... I'm whelmed.'

'Why should I look forward to the weekend? Rake leaves, clean out the gutters, mend the fence, wash the car...'

"Mrs. Stiltz asked Jean to ask Genie to ask..."

'The key to my job security is nobody knows I'm actually working here.'

"Looks like Jonesy got his walking papers."

'Do you have bottled spring water?'

'Ptuwah! This is tap water!'