Warriors Transitioning Gifts

WAR COLLEGE, new minor: peacekeeping.

Xena: Warrior Princess, TV star, professional volleyball player.

Clancy Strip:At a Restaurant

Hot dog.

"I'll have what's left of my people get in touch with what's left of your people."

The auto-update demons attack-again."

"I'm trying to determine if the aches and pains are from an injury or just my new normal."

Just Married

'I've reached that age where I've given up on Mind Over Matter and am concentrating on Mind Over Bladder.'

School Supplies and Small Loans.

"Remember to keep hydrated, tell me when you want more Prosecco."

'Did they say WHY you could no longer be a Spartan?' 'Something about, 'image'.'

"I see you have a master's degree and have served 73 unpaid internships. Do you think you're ready for a salaried job?'

Very Early in the Reorganization.

"The Chef's Special is to die for. If you order it, you'll need to sign a waiver."

"Twice a week I eat nothing but fruit."

"It's the wife - I can't even fight a war in bloody peace!"

'If that aquarium is supposed to help me relax, it's not really working.'

'School vacation is over...come along quietly.'

'Uh-oh, teacher burnout!'

Genghis Khan

'I'll never get out of the third grade -- They keep raising the retirement age.'

"I fed the baby but if you don't want to see the results look away now."

Parents preparing for the new school year.

'That's right, buddy. Keep moving after the young ones. We've had enough of this ‘weeding out the old and sick' business.'

'In the relocation game, there were few secrets. . . Bob's lads weren't just slow, they were rough!'

None of my plants do well...but I forgot I had an onion in my refrigerator, and it's sprouting leaves and growing well.

"Ugh, I'm too hungover for salvation-come back later."

Boudicca

Lose the will to live...with last minute Christmas shopping.

Viking Hats.

"The sharp quills protect me from creditors."

"As usual, Sitting Bull's brother, Sitting Duck, was the first to be wounded..."

'Well, Alex, we survived the first day of the new school year.'