Warfare Wit Gifts

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

Sir Louie the Bench-Warmer pumps up the home crowd, and the tide of battle begins to turn.

Light Artillery

"This position has become very important to the company."

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Putin and Zelensky

I'm a self-made man!

'How would you feel about working in a small pond?'

Soldier armed with a pen.

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

How are you at decision making?

"A one-word email reply... classic power move."

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

'We'd like to pay you what you're worth, too, Fenstrom. Unfortunately we must conform to the minimum wage law.'

He used to pass the buck, since being promoted to management he gets to call it delegating authority.

'General, please hire large armies of foreign mercenaries to complete the works of death, desolation and tyranny.'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"Your credentials are impressive, Carter but... quite frankly, Mr. Biggles doesn't seem to like you."

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

"That's a very difficult problem to address, Ted, could you restate it as a solution?"

"Damn it,Frank,if I can't bully my staff, who can I bully?"

"Get off the stage and get a copy of 'Studies of Laughter in Interaction'—I think you'll enjoy it."

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

"Pendleton will stay afloat no matter what!"

"No more thinking outside the box Bamford. From now on I want you to do all your thinking inside your box!"

'Please Henderson - Not another one of your bright ideas!'

"Miss Jones, bring me into the 21st century..."

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

'I'm working with a bunch of cavemen.'

'Where's the fun in being an employer if you can't spontaneously sack someone anymore.'

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

'I see you have extensive experience eating, sleeping, and mating. That puts you two steps ahead of all the college graduates who have applied.'

"You're late, Myers!"

Siege of Vicksburg - Sappers Approach Confederate Fortifications