War Games Gifts

Last man standing?

'Every war game scenario I've run has you picking up the check.'

'We'll just run it past the ethics committee, and we'll be on our way.'

"G 8"

Navy games.

'This paintball war has really spun out of control.'

'Why do you always get to be the tanks?'

The gaming world.

'Wow! A big cardboard box!' - 'Target sighted! Engage 'stealth mode'' - 'Your dinner's ready.'

'Gentlemen, the fate of the free world depends on us getting more little toy tanks and ships!'

Catapult.

"By George, that should do it - as long as we don[t bomb our own men again "

Cyber War

"Back in my day, 'Call of Duty' wasn't a game."

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

Can You Spot the Differences?

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

Holiday time.

Bowled over again!

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

"I told you playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey was a dumb idea."

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

'Super Dog'

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

Mixed Doubles.

"All I did this summer was go fishing, camping, bike riding, swimming, boating, and go the movies, carnivals, fairs, concerts and games. I'm bored."

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

'How about a game of cards?'

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .