Wannabe James Bond Gifts

"He says he thinks he could be the next James Bond."

James Bond in a Snow Globe

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

New Guy.

Zorro as a child.

"Next, I'd like to play 'Guantanamera.'"

Runs-With-Scissors Boy - Part One

All Les's dreams of stardom were coming true, and he'd only played one note.

As Seen On TV

'When we start the countdown, you creep up under the rocket, light the fuse, then run like hell.'

'I think winning that last hand went to Bob's head, because he now has an entourage.'

My First Boat

Their lowest cost vacation yet.

Your Palm

'I don't see how you can put your profession as TV star just because you were in the crowd of Match of the Day!'

House building chart (like steps).

Everyone in Tinseltown deserves 15 minutes of obscurity.

The Don't-Quit-Your-Day-Job Comedic Revue

"There comes a time, Little Buddy, when you have to just accept that you'll never be famous....that your life will never be adapted for television and that when you die, only five or six people will truly care."

Musician sings off key while his dog can only watch,his jaws strapped together

"I found my thrill on Blueberry Hill."

I heard you're on your way to Europe to secure a source of black market hepatitis C drugs. What? What are you talking about? I deny everything. Where did you hear that? You added an airplane pillow, the "German For Dummies," the book "Hep C and You," and "Smugglerco Duffel Bag w/Secret Compartment" to your Amazon wishlist. I ordered you the book "Not Everyone Is Cut Out For A Life Of Crime." I deny everything.

'Confessing your sins in a folk ballad was an interesting idea, Larry, but I'm afraid your singing has forced me to add one more sin to your list!'

Blue Origin

Trying to thumb his nose at authority, Lumpy stuck his thumb in his eye! Man covering eye with his hand.

Joel's mum was very strict. . . No homework, no air guitar.

'Be reasonable, son - even Santa couldn't get a horse into a box THAT size!'

Dave's new nail gun revived the childhood ambitions he'd had before realizing that he could earn more as a carpenter than as a hero.

'I suppose you'd like your porridge shaken, not stirred?'

A young boy shaving

"So a plumber charges $600 for 45 minutes' work?! Is that the coolest job or what?!"

In-law country

'Jon likes to think he's 'rock 'n' roll'.'

What he really hoped to be someday was a TV news anchor.

'But look, Sire -- a whole lot of people have you down as their fifth choice!'