Wand-wielding Wizard T-Shirts

'I'm here to test the magic 8-ball.'

Candle Portraits.

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

D.I.Y

"So long, boys. I'm off to the big city to try my hand at chainsaw sculpture."

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

'Brian's saved us a small fortune...making all our own furniture!'

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

"Victims of out-sorcery."

Obama of Oz.

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"Most projects require three hands."

"That could've been ours. But noooo...You and your DIY."

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

Woodpecker carves David out of tree.

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'I'm telling you, I don't have a good feeling about this.'

'Good, lots of waxy buildup.'

Why you should never leave a sander alone in a locked room.

'It's worse than we thought... You've got termites.'

"Wait. Let me have one more try."