Vocational Trainer Gifts

'I bet we could have put you together if we'd gone through all the king's union apprentice programs.'

"I'd like to apply for the work-study program."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"Portrait of a Lady"

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"This feels like an accomplishment."

On the back of the t-shirt...

Muscles

"Any questions?"

Be Healthy

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"You're a strong, virile stallion of a man, Randy. Has anyone ever told you that?"

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Any questions?"

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

Biceps, muscles and brawn