Vintage Machinery Buff Gifts

Sidelights on the Wig Industry

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

Crane fishing

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

Acme Slide Rules: 'We'll be here and ready, when the current electronic gadgetry fad fades!'

"On your mark! Get set!"

Obsolete: Any piece of machinery that you bought last week for $100,000.

Jake wonders if the manufacturer went a little too far with its new earth mover product line.

"You know the great thing about human beings? They're biodegradable."

Man checks the gears in his chest.

"Your steak's prepared in the firebox of a 17th century tank engine - unfortunately sir, the chef can't confirm if it has 0-60T wheel arrangement or not."

Bagging the Chipmunk

An old-fashioned printer using an Albion press.

Elephant with front end loader using tusks.

'I just invented the darn thing yesterday, and this morning, Watson calls in sick!'

Kids hiding plug to giant machine.

Lighting a Pipe

A cheese grader

Combined Harvester

"We'll be performing the operation using original instruments."

Cat flap for a truck.

'It makes one feel old - I can remember the very first time they replaced this.'

'Sergeant! Wake up the lazer guided slaughter-bot. We have a mission for him.'; Reply - 'But he looks so peaceful, Sir.'

Ski Vagaries in Switzerland

"It's for you."

'Where's the starter?'

'As part of our growth strategy we intend to build 76% more of them...as soon as we find out what they do!'

"So how many extra widgets do we have to produce to pay for the surveillance system to check we're making enough widgets?"

'I've always wanted to see inside an x-ray machine.'

'This is not an automatic elevator, sir.'

The development of cars.

"Did the earth move for you too?"