Vintage Machinery Lover Gifts

Obsolete: Any piece of machinery that you bought last week for $100,000.

The Bicycle 'Ghost'

"Your steak's prepared in the firebox of a 17th century tank engine - unfortunately sir, the chef can't confirm if it has 0-60T wheel arrangement or not."

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

Crane fishing

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

"Could I have a Tommy Tippee cup for my friend's beer, as he's been using a concrete breaker all day."

Forty-five words per minute? Impossible!

"On your mark! Get set!"

Jake wonders if the manufacturer went a little too far with its new earth mover product line.

"You know the great thing about human beings? They're biodegradable."

Bagging the Chipmunk

"Look Zorg, an antique!"

Man checks the gears in his chest.

An old-fashioned printer using an Albion press.

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you repaired it last time.'

"Car Boot Sale" at motor salvage depot.

Combined Harvester

Lighting a Pipe

Elephant with front end loader using tusks.

A cheese grader

"Usually when someone claims they've installed the latest technology, it means more than just power windows."

Kids hiding plug to giant machine.

"When you're done here can you look at my laptop?"

Cat flap for a truck.

'I think I've found out why you're experiencing a bumpy ride.'

"I find things go around in cycles."

The seemingly wanton destruction of private property corp.

'Sergeant! Wake up the lazer guided slaughter-bot. We have a mission for him.'; Reply - 'But he looks so peaceful, Sir.'

Ski Vagaries in Switzerland

"This is a CLASSIC pre-owned special. See, it has a cigarette lighter instead of a USB socket."

'Where's the starter?'

'I'll still advertise the car in the newspaper,if it is alright with you Mildred.'

Milk production

'As part of our growth strategy we intend to build 76% more of them...as soon as we find out what they do!'