Veterinary Surgeon Gifts

"And they'll remain in captivity until they are fully rehabilitated and able to fly again."

"And when the time comes the company will put you to sleep at its own expense."

Why pets need vets.

"Look what they did to her! We should be thankful they only had us spayed."

Cat in bandages.

'You mean you want good communication and competent service?'

'This is one sick dog.'

'Bovine Palpation'

'Word to the wise: Always check the cheese for pills.'

'Yesterday we ran a CBC, a BUN, a liver profile...

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

'He was a physician, but because of all the difficult patients he gave it up and became a veterinarian.'

'I see improvement . . . but you're not out of the woods, yet.'

'This is one sick dog!'

'Doctor, your glasses!'

"Trust me: It's benign."

A trip to the vet's.

Sick Bee

"You were a veterinarian? Would you take a look at my left wing?"

Hamster on dialysis machine 'In my day we'd have had him put down.'

'Sit down! If you're a veterinarian, you'll want to hear about Baron.'

"I heard he is so hard-core that he enjoys vet visits and likes riding in a cat carrier."

"They're not the tastiest, so try hiding them in a piece of cheese before you take them."

'The vet wanted to give him one of those plastic things but I said I have a much nicer lampshade thank you very much.'

"Ok, let's try it one last time. It's 'Ahhhhhh'..."

"Ned has laryngitis... He's disgruntled."

"I'm afraid, Mr. Cottontail, that all that hopping down the bunny trail has taken a toll on your hips."

'If it doesn't itch, why worry?'

"Your bite is worse than your bark. You need braces."

'You broke your wishbone. I'd suggest making a wish.'

"How sick are you feeling?"

Noah's Ark: 'Two Vets Wanted.'

"He suffers from bone loss. He can't remember where he buries them."

'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'

'Nocardiosis! Does that mean his heart is gone?'