Veterinary Care Gifts

'Word to the wise: Always check the cheese for pills.'

'And then, this morning, I suddenly noticed she didn't look so good.'

'Call me that one more time and you can find yourself another doctor!'

'Scamp, this is Doctor Drummond. Stop scratching! Stop it!'

"I guess you're already aware that your dog's rabies is highly infectious?"

Sick Bee

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

'If you step up to the curtain, we'll begin the cat scan.'

"I'm afraid, Mr. Cottontail, that all that hopping down the bunny trail has taken a toll on your hips."

"He wags, but his tail doesn't."

'Instead of brushing my teeth can't I just chew on one of his dog biscuits?'

'There's nothing wrong with 'Cutie-Pie' Miss Timpson, but I think you may need glasses.'

'Wait! Hold everything! There's something wrong here!'

'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

"Sorry - my dog is at the vet. This one is a loaner."

"For your vet bills alone we can hire two pups."

'No, they're not age spots.'

'I used to call Doctor Hinshaw, but he was always wantin money...

"You're not a gift horse, are you?"

The Clipping

''E's going for the 'double'!'

Man dragging dog into Emmett's Fix-It Shop.

Canis Osteoarthritis.

"I found this dying swan."

Chiropractor and Veterinarian.

Dog hides eyes as car turns into vet clinic.

'I have no idea why your throat hurts, but what I can do is write you a small fortune in prescriptions to help mask the symptoms.'

Should've been routine. That was before the dog called and offered to pay twice as much to have the master put down.

'Level with me, Doc. How bad is it? What's it going to cost?'

'Nocardiosis! Does that mean his heart is gone?'

'Yes, it's toxic, but look: If the host dies, the worms die too!'

'Well, I've heard that you are a genius at replacing prolapses, Doc.'

I can't afford to pay for Fluffy's spay...