Veterinary Assistance Gifts

'I just had to stop by and thank you for all the advice...'

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Lactose Intolerant

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

"This never happened."

Should've been routine. That was before the dog called and offered to pay twice as much to have the master put down.

"A CAT scan? Are you sure?"

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

"Fill it up!"

Dog with saucepan stuck on its head

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'

Cat Scan

'I can see a visit to the vet, but, oh my, no more kids after that!...'

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

'The vet said that getting spayed might hurt a little. But having nine puppies hurt a little, too.'

'Honestly, now that Tiger is neutered I'm perfectly happy just cuddling.'

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

"I'm excited to get fixed at the vet, had no idea I was broken."

'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'