Vet Care Comedian Gifts

'We appreciate you loyalty to your clientele, Doctor,...

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

"Satisfaction, stat!"

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

A classic case of 'Cow-Worm'.

Committee On Feline Healthcare

"He's a rescue, and before that he was in Vaudeville."

'Sure you can have another opinion but I still say you are a fat pig.'

"You've had dogs, cats, birds and even a pony. . . how come your only pets that survive are fish, Arielle?"

Of course you're feeling disgruntled. You've lost your voice.

"Want to see me make him beg, roll over and shake?"

Cat Blog.

"Medical insurance? Are you kidding? No one will cover me for nine lives!"

"These days, I don't eat homework. I just install ransomware."

'Why do they refuse to drink water out of a bowl that's been left out for two hours, but go gaga over toilet water?'

Casey's Veterinarian Clinic and Taxidermy 'Either way you'll get your pet back.'

101 uses of a dead cat: bagpipe

'...windpuffs in front and a capped hock on the right rear...'

'Don't worry, it's just the anaesthetic...'

'Nonsense, Melvin! Who ever heard of a tapeworm that big?'

Hang Time Fido

'But hey, who am I to complain?'

'Can't read this one either. Think anyone would mind if I just rolled around in them?'

'This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you!'

Strictly Ornamental.

'I said - MOVE IT!'

"Sure, you used to be a YouTube sensation. But what have you done lately."

'Here's a stupid question...are you getting enough sleep?'

"Yep, that's water retention."

"Darling, this dog food is delicious!"

'No, I'm sorry. I'm Doctor Ford and I do the large animal work....'

Why hamsters don't sleep at night.

'Now you do know she needs a bath every week and an oil change every 3000 miles?'

'How the heck does one do CPR on a tortoise?'